"Stress-Free" Rehearsal

Before Rehearsal

• Have the ceremony all planned.
• Send rehearsal reminders to all the wedding party attendants.
• Schedule one hour rehearsal.
• Arrange to have all children in the party arrive 15 minutes before all others.

At the Rehearsal
Practice everything as realistically as possible:

• Pre-rehearse with any children. Walk them down the aisle to make them comfortable and confident.
• Have the attendants and parents practice in their wedding shoes at the rehearsal.
• Walk down the aisle (it is not bad luck!)
• Have ushers, readers, musicians, and other helpers know the time when they need to do their job.
• Walk through the ceremony from beginning to end.

The rehearsal dinner provides a welcome relief from the hard work involved in planning a wedding. This festive function is a safe harbor amidst a sea of formality, for it holds a limited number of do’s and don’ts. The only major rule is common sense and good taste.

The occasion is at time for the families and members of the wedding party to relax and get to know each other. The groom's family or a close relative or friend usually hosts the rehearsal dinner. It is usually given after the wedding rehearsal, the night before the actual ceremony.

In a tradition dating back to the early 1800s, the bride's family gave a bridal feast the day of the wedding and the groom's family hosted a wedding breakfast the day after. This breakfast was called an "infare." It provided an occasion for family, wedding party and out-of-town guests to visit and review the previous day's festivities. Travelers then departed, taking with them the warmth of hospitality. The rehearsal dinner is today's version of the infare.

Rehearsal dinners can be two-part affairs. A cocktail party may be held before the rehearsal and dinner. The cocktail party can be a break for members of the wedding. However, it should be a short affair, as too much alcohol could lead to problems during the rehearsal. The rehearsal dinner may be formal or casual.

Invitations should be sent out about two weeks before the dinner. The guest list includes all members of the wedding party, both sets of parents, immediate family and officiating church members. Spouses and dates of these guests should also be invited. A thoughtful gesture is to invite those guests who have traveled from out of town.

The bridal couple sits together at the head table, with hosts of the opposite sex seated at either side. Parents and grandparents of the couple complete the table.

The host, or the best man, offers the first toast to the bridal couple. Other guest may follow with his or her own toasts.

It is important to enjoy the beginning of this weekend, but it is also important that the wedding party gets a good nights rest. Don't send guests home in a condition that would inhibit their participation in the next day's activities